Confused. Tilted head. Contemplative. Happiness. Joy seen through another's eye. Appearance of one. Guilt. Sigh. Melting. More confusion. Regret. Wondering what words spoken shouldn't have been and what words unspoken should have.
Thoughtful eyes. Pursed lips. A knowledge of things to do, nagging the background of thoughts, like a timer ticking ready to go off. Dreams, thoughts, hopes, fears. Trying to meet standards not meant to be met. Chained by standards and expectations or the longing to fit in, to be someone. An underlying, rejected truth: to be someone, you shouldn't fit in. Judgement. Misspelled.
Apathy. Curiosity. What if? What now? Shackles of the world, of friends, of family. Tip-toing on broken glass. A longing just to do it because I can and not to care what anyone says. But once the moment is over... Rules. Meant to break? Meant to bend? Meant to chain? Mind. Meant for thinking. Fingers. Meant for writing. Chocolate. Meant for comfort. Legs. Meant for running.
Responsibilities...duties...things to do, read, write. Time. Time slips, fades, stands still for breathless moments in the corners of the mind's hopeful eye. Never. Pathes crossing and twisting. Friendships. Where they have been, how long they'll last, where they're going, how they started. Pain to watch, helplessly, as boats sink filled with those loved. Longing to tell them simple truths only they can discover for themselves. Want to be a friend. Just a friend. How to be a friend? I don't know. I don't know. Nothing. Anything. Everything. Circles, endless, like a DVD player stuck in fastforward. Sigh. Thoughts. Fragments. Notepad. Decipher it if you can. Take what you will. Clueless. Confused. But still...Happy to be human. Happy to be me. Are you? Retorical question. Your turn to think.
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6 comments:
Don't feel inclined to comment, if there's nothing to be said. In fact...you don't have to comment if there is something to be said. Only if you want to.
This comes out to me as a rebellion against enjoyable existence.
Troubled, weary, confused; helpless to decide, troubled, mangled, depressed; sad, forget-it. Why try, why waste time trying to figure out why one should try? Escaping memories of happy times, forgetfulness of the word happy; boredom, restlessness, hopelessness; unending darkness?
Twisted thoughts lead to early death. Deranged ludicrously?
There be somethin' we no knowin' about yo, Bon-Fire.
There be more existing behind your turmoil.
What it be, Bon-Fire?
loneliness, hopeless, endless; coldness, laugh-less sadness; grief, wrath, pain; never to do it again.
~The Silouette
*shakes head*
Twas only meaningless thoughts and feelings.
Ok then.
:ninja:
I feel...unobservant. I didn't even see this post somehow 0o;;
-hugs tight- Sounds like something I'd write. Which isn't a good sign, necessarily...
-doesn't happen to believe your last comment right there :6: -
-demands to know if you're alright, even though, and especially because this post is four days old- <<
{But thanks for writing me a novel!}
*nods* Yeah. I put it up there more of a reminder to myself. You know how sometimes little things can make you think and contemplate? And it's not even like a big thing, it's just like "hm..." and you feel your mood changing? Well...if that makes sense...that's what happened to me. And that's like literally the way I think. Random phrases. Just me being overdramatic because I needed a new post. It's nothing bad. *hugs Any* Thanks for your concern.
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